Be the hero your child needs: The right system to help your child through school

Is your little one struggling with school grades lately?

Do you feel frustrated at your child or probably helpless by your own reactions?

Is it becoming harder to sort out what to do so it all becomes better?

It’s okay if it’s happening, you are not alone. You want their best ultimately right?

Most parents often go through this patch with their children. It’s another part of a synovial wave in your parenting trek. All that matters is how you find your thorough way through these series of troughs and crusts.

Growing up I was coerced by my wellwishers into scoring high grades. According to them, it would help me land good positions in my professional life for future ventures.

So I would study day and night just to make my parents happy, to make them proud of me and feel worthy and deserving of their love because this was what I was taught. They wanted all that was best for me.

Until…

I failed a maths exam.

They were disappointed, frustrated and angry at me, I had not just failed one petty exam but actually, I had failed them. It made me lose confidence in my own abilities, a fear of dejection started to cloud my thoughts and eventually, I felt distant from my parents.

A distaste appeared and made me feel whatever I’ll do it would never be enough for them. They never expressed any appreciation towards my efforts, maybe I really am a bad kid.

They don’t deserve this – eventually, the bond was fostered by indifference, distance and lack of affection.

Now I look back and feel if only they had understood that kids fail all the time. Mistakes and failures are not antagonists to success but are actually part of the journey.

I bet you can relate to my story above because this is becoming a really common problem among families now.

As a parent, it’s natural to want the best for your child and to see them succeed in all aspects of their life, including school. While it’s important to encourage and support your child’s academic endeavours, it’s also important to remember that it’s completely normal for kids to make mistakes and encounter challenges.

In fact, it’s through making mistakes and facing challenges that children learn and grow.

Today’s article is not about how your child can avoid failure. It’s all about how you can connect with your struggling child through positive reinforcements and become their favourite superhero.

We are going to discuss in detail how you can help your own little one towards a brighter, happier and more successful life.

It all begins with:

Reflecting and Identifying

Every problem comes with the right kind of solution, but how can you reach your solution when you have not even given a faint thought to identifying and reflecting on the context of the situation?

Questions lead to answers and answers give us our solutions.

As a parent, you must always begin with internal reflection calmly.

Beginning with a few questions such as

a) How much your child is hurt when they fail?
b) What would happen if you as a parent start blaming the child for not paying attention in class, would that hurt the child even more?
c) what can you do to understand them better and sort it out for them?

We know it can be difficult to gauge how much your child is hurting when they fail but have you thought maybe the child himself feels a deep sense of shame and insecurity when they fail?

Blaming the child for not paying attention in class can have a negative effect on the child. It can lead to feelings of shame, insecurity, and low self-esteem, which can further hinder the child’s ability to focus and succeed in school

At Lincoln method, we conducted a study of over 6,200 students in 2022. We saw a common pattern of how kids recover from failing grades.

The diversity of different approaches made us realize something very significant. 40% of students who were encouraged through the right coping mechanism performed way better in their followed up exams, while the rest 60% still struggled with their grades.

We reached a conclusion that there is a right and a wrong way to help a child going through the misery of falling behind in class.

After observing these steps closely, we have compiled some points that can help you too in your quest of becoming the ultimate hero of your child in his academic process.

1. Stay calm and supportive: The key to comforting a distressed child

Don’t panic, don’t blame the child, and tell the child not to worry because you will help fix the situation.

*The first step is to be emotionally available to the child*

One of the most important things to remember when a child is in distress is to remain calm and supportive. It’s natural to feel panicked or upset in these situations, but it’s important to keep these emotions in check in order to be emotionally available to the child.

This means refraining from placing blame on the child or telling them to stop worrying, and instead focusing on offering comfort and reassurance.

One way to do this is to simply be present with the child, listening to them and providing a supportive and nonjudgmental space for them to express their feelings.

You can also offer physical comforts, such as a hug or a pat on the back, to help the child feel safe and supported.

It’s also important to reassure the child that you are there to help and that you will work together to fix the situation. This can help the child feel more in control and less overwhelmed.

2. Don’t rely on schools alone to support your child: Become their hero

Talking to the school usually does not help because they are already understaffed and under-resourced, and they will not necessarily understand that your child is hurting.

Relying on the schools to fix the situation does not always work. Remember that your goal should be to become your child’s hero because that is what they really need at this time.

Schools may not have the capacity to provide the level of support that your child needs. In these situations, it’s understandable to feel frustrated and overwhelmed, and you may be tempted to rely on the school to fix the situation.

However, it’s important to remember that relying on the school to fix the situation may not always work. Instead, it’s important to take an active role in your child’s education and well-being and to become your child’s hero. This means being a supportive and encouraging presence in your child’s life, being actively involved in their education, and finding strategies to help your child overcome challenges.

One way to do this is to work closely with your child’s teacher to identify any areas of concern and to develop a plan to address them.
This may involve providing additional resources or support at home.
Setting small goals and working towards them, or finding ways to help your child develop problem-solving skills can also aid.

By taking an active role in your child’s education and well-being, you can become your child’s saviour and provide the support they need to succeed in school.

Remember, it’s okay to seek additional support and resources when needed, but it’s important to remember that only you have significant power to make a positive impact on your child’s academic journey

3. Avoiding Conflict: Be a supportive Parent

As a parent, it’s natural to want to do everything you can to help your child succeed, including providing academic support at home. However, it’s important to remember that it’s not always possible or advisable for parents to take on the role of teacher for their child.

One reason for this is that it can lead to friction and frustration between you and the child. Teaching can be a challenging and rewarding profession, but it requires specialized training and skills that may not come naturally to everyone.

If you try to teach your child without these skills, it can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts that can create a more toxic situation at home.

Another reason is that your role as a parent is to provide emotional support to your child, not to serve as their primary source of academic instruction.

It’s important to create a positive and supportive home environment where your child feels safe and supported, rather than stressed and overwhelmed.

In short, while it’s important to support your child’s academic endeavours and to be involved in their education, it’s also important to recognize the limitations of your role as a parent.

If you find that you are struggling to effectively teach your child or that your efforts are leading to more conflicts at home, it may be helpful to seek additional support and resources, such as tutoring or educational resources.

By finding a balance between providing emotional support and recognizing the limits of your role as a parent, you can help your child succeed in school and develop a positive and supportive relationship at home

4. Get Additional Support

If things are not looking better you can always choose to get advice from an expert tutor to identify where the problem areas are. An expert tutor can provide valuable advice for identifying and addressing your child’s problem areas.

The tutors at Lincoln Method are particularly skilled in this regard. They are friendly and take the time to fully understand the student, rather than rushing through sessions. These tutors have received training and are certified to help students succeed.

They will approach each session with a friendly and supportive attitude, creating a comfortable and welcoming environment for learning.

At Lincoln Method, the tutors are not only trained and certified in helping students succeed but they are also selected for their ability to connect with students and create a positive learning experience.

By working with an expert tutor from Lincoln Method, you can trust that your child will receive the personalized support they need to reach their full potential.

Some common reasons why a child might benefit from working with our tutors include:

Struggling to keep up with classwork and falling behind
Difficulty understanding specific subjects or concepts
Low grades or test scores
Lack of motivation or engagement in school
Difficulty with organization and time management
Difficulty with reading, writing, or other language-based tasks
Struggling with attention and focus

A tutor can work with a child one-on-one to address these and other challenges, providing extra support and guidance to help them catch up, stay on track, and succeed academically.

They can also help a child build confidence and motivation, and develop important study skills and habits that will benefit them in the long term.

5) Getting Customized Lesson plans

Ask the tutor to create a lesson plan that will chart out the way how to help the child address their weak areas.

At Lincoln Method, parents who work with tutors always receive a monthly lesson plan. This helps ensure that a focused approach is being followed and that progress is being made. By working with a tutor and following a lesson plan, you can help your child overcome their academic challenges and succeed.

Imagine your child is struggling with math. They consistently score low on tests and have a hard time keeping up with the material in class. As a parent, you want to help them improve, but you’re not sure where to start.

That’s where a lesson plan comes in.

By working with our tutors, you can create a customized plan that outlines specific goals and strategies for improving your child’s math skills. The plan might include things like

Identifying the specific math concepts your child is struggling with
Providing extra practice and reinforcement of those concepts
Using visual aids and other tools to help your child better understand the material
Setting realistic goals and tracking progress over time

With a lesson plan in place, you and your child’s tutor can work together to focus on the areas where your child needs the most support.

You’ll have a clear roadmap for improvement, and you’ll know that you’re following a focused approach that is tailored to your child’s specific needs.

6) Rome Wasn’t Built in a Day

Don’t rush the recovery and don’t expect immediate results. Remember that recovery takes a bit of time. The first few weeks will be difficult, and it is understandable if the child wants to quit.

Imagine that your child has been struggling with a fever, and you’ve decided to seek help from a doctor. You both go in with high hopes and a desire to see quick results.

However, as the weeks go by, you start to feel frustrated that your child’s illness hasn’t completely disappeared. They may even express a desire to give up on medication.

It’s important to remember that recovery takes time. It’s not uncommon for progress to be slow at first, especially when it comes to more complex issues like anxiety. It’s important to be patient and to support your child through the process.

Your role in this situation is to be a supportive figure for your child.

This means being there for them, listening to them, and encouraging them to keep going, even when things get tough. It’s okay if they want to quit or if they feel like they’re not making enough progress.

Just being there for them can make a big difference and help them feel less alone.

Remember, recovery is a journey, not a destination. It may take longer than you initially expected, but the important thing is that you are there for your child every step of the way.

7. Videos and Worksheets

Ask the tutor to provide you with supplemental learning videos and worksheets so that you watch them with the child and can do the worksheets in your spare time.

It might be helpful to ask the tutor for these types of resources so that you can work with the child on their studies outside of their regular tutoring sessions.

Watching videos and completing worksheets together can be a fun and effective way to reinforce the material that the child is learning with the tutor.

These resources can help your child through many domains like

Repetition is key to learning: By watching videos and completing worksheets on the same material that the child is learning with their tutor, they will have the opportunity to see and work with the material multiple times. This can help reinforce their understanding and make the material easier to remember.

Practice makes perfect: Completing worksheets is a great way for the child to practice applying what they have learned. This can help them become more comfortable and confident with the material.

Personalized learning: By working with the child on these activities, you can tailor the pace and difficulty to their specific needs and learning style. This can make the learning experience more effective and engaging for them.

Bonding time: Working on learning activities together can also be a great opportunity for you and the child to bond and have fun together.

Flexibility: Using supplemental learning resources, such as videos and worksheets, can also be a convenient way to make use of any extra time that may come up, such as while waiting at the doctor’s office or during a long car ride. This can help keep the child engaged and learning, even when they are not in a formal educational setting.

8. Be Present for your child

Being a supportive parent entails that you have to be present for your child, this can happen in certain ways:

Spend quality time with them: Make an effort to set aside time each day to spend with the child, whether it’s playing a game, reading a book, or just hanging out. This can help them feel loved and supported during difficult times.

Show physical affection: Give the child hugs, kisses, and other forms of physical affection to let them know that you care. This can help them feel more secure and comforted.

Listen and ask open-ended questions: Instead of constantly asking about their progress, try to engage the child in conversation about other topics that interest them. This can help them feel like they have your full attention and that you are genuinely interested in what they have to say.

Do something fun together: Take the child out for ice cream or some other activity that they enjoy. This can be a great way to bond and help them take their mind off of their recovery.

Be patient and understanding: Recovery can be a long and difficult process, and it’s important to be patient and understanding with the child. They may have good days and bad days, and it’s important to be there for them no matter what. It can also be helpful to let them know that it’s okay to take things at their own pace and that you will be there to support them every step of the way.

9. Track the progress

Ask the tutor for regular updates so you can track the progress. The tutor should be able to provide this every day. This way you can always be involved recovery process, but just remember that this should not give you an excuse to constantly pester your child about their recovery.

You have to remember that your goal is to become your child’s hero. stay informed about their progress and try to be a positive influence in their life and show them love and affection

10. Make it Fun

Trained and certified tutors, like those at Lincoln Method, can make the learning process fun and interactive by using small games, hands-on activities, and encouraging student participation. These strategies can help keep students engaged and motivated, leading to more effective learning.

Conclusion

If your child is struggling academically, you can support them and become their hero by understanding the root cause of their struggles, working with their teacher to come up with a plan, seeking extra help outside of school if necessary, providing emotional support and encouragement, and helping your child develop good study habits and a positive attitude towards learning. These steps can help your child overcome their challenges and succeed academically.

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